Saturday, June 16, 2007

Whole Foods?

So my male audience may want to skip to the next posting...

Okay, you've been pregnant for the past nine months, great, what does that mean? No period. Nice! Decent trade off, right? No PMS, no cramps, sure, you had bloating, morning sickness, random pregnancy related rashes, pregnancy induced hypertension, stuffy nose, snoring, unprecedented weight gain, insane levels of water retention, but still, no period! Well, guess what? Now you've had the baby and the body says-- let's go! We've been waiting nine months for this! Let the flood gates open! Everyone had told me to bring my preferred brand of maxi pad with me to the hospital. Done. Not that I really had a preferred brand, but I picked out one that seemed normal. Then the doctors tell me that this whole phase may last between 6 and 8 weeks (yeeoch!) And everyone feels the need to remind me that tampons are verboten. Really. You don't need to tell someone that, it kind of makes sense at this point. Trust me. ANYWAY. The other day I found myself about to run out of the pads.

I made the mistake of trying to buy replacements at Whole Foods. For people who only shop at Whole Foods, what on earth do you do for personal care products??

I am in the aisle with these types of items and there are two brands. One *really* looks like it is from 1800 and the other looks vaguely like it might be normal. Of course it was made by "Seventh Generation"-- the people who make the "natural" toilet paper. They also said in giant letters on the outer packaging "Chlorine Free"... Chlorine Free? Who knew there's Chlorine in a maxi pad??? I should have known better. I should have gone to Wegmans, but we had Miss Sophie with us in the car and she was reaching the end of her comfort level with being out in the car... Anyway, I buy them. The checker puts them in the same bag as my black bean dip (Another pet peeve-- why are we putting something absorbent in with something that can leak? But that's a post for another time...) I get these things home and they were essentially the equivalent of a giant paper dinner napkin. Not particularly comfortable, seemingly not particularly absorbent. Again, if you shop exclusively at Whole Foods not only do you never have access to Oreos, but you also have far inferior hygiene products. I can't completely explain why, but with some products you really need to have that NASA space age technology and if Chlorine is involved, well then let the environment be damned!

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