Friendly Advice

To the woman behind me in line at the automated postal machine at the Rockefeller Center Post Office:

No one is disputing that you're next in line. You really don't have to keep hitting me in the back with your package, especially since there is a large counter next to you that you may rest your package on. In fact, if you hit me one more time with that package both you and it will be unceremoniously shoved into the large package receptacle directly next to the automated postal machine.

To the woman behind my in line at Hale and Hearty Soups who pronounced "asparagus, potato and leek" as "As-para-goose, po-ta-too, LEEEK":

We're all in line for soup. Though some of us may choose to also purchase a half sandwich and achieve a "soup and sandwich combo", we are, nonetheless, ahead of you and looking to purchase soup. When the soup specialist calls out "may I have the next person for soup" you don't need to throw your hand up in the air and yell, "As-para-goose!", since there are at least 6 to 7 people ahead of you in line.

Just a little friendly advice from your local, angry pregnant woman. And, personal favor, please stop playing with those sleigh bells.