Sunday, June 28, 2009


One of the Gymboree moms recently met another mom who suggested starting a knitting/crochet circle play group. This with the hope of blending play dates for the kids with knitting time for the moms. Sounds like a good enough idea, right?

An email was circulated to the group and Crazy Mom was one of the first to weigh in:

"Farm camp is over! Kindergarten is over! Dance class and swim class and t-ball are over! This coming week is flexible. Thing 1's first camp is 8:30-11:30 week after next, so 9-11 I'm cool."

9-11? First of all, I love to knit but there is no way in hell I'm waking up early enough to get myself and Miss B. anywhere to knit at 9am.

Secondly, what the *)^&? is "Farm Camp"?

Okay, fine. The first meeting coincided with our visit to Mel's house so we had to politely decline. Prior to this first meeting one of the other Gymboree mom's had suggested that maybe the next meeting could be at her house or at my house so the collective group wouldn't have to drive all the way to Pennsylvania (where the first meeting was to take place... so get this, I would theoretically be getting up early enough not only to knit at 9am, but knit at 9am IN PENNSYLVANIA. Yeah, so *not* happening, but I digress).

This suggestion was thrown out while we were at the park. In all honesty I was only really half-listening. It took me a moment or so to realize that she had said that we could have the meeting at *MY* house. Okay, let me process this-- you've just offered up my house?

Fine. So she keeps talking and I say, "okay, whatever, we'll see-- I'm fine with coming to your house or going to Yardley" I really didn't say too much about it because I'm thinking to myself that I'm not going to be able to go to the first meeting so I'm not even going to have met any of the people who are in the group who we don't already know... she can't honestly expect me to host this thing, right?


The day after the knitting group I get a message on Facebook telling me that everybody will be coming over to my house Thursday at 10am! Not only that but Crazy Mom and her kids will be there (at which point I flash back to Thing 2 climbing on my furniture attempting to molest my deer head) and the lady who hosted last time (who I've never met) will not only be bringing her child but will be bringing a friend and their child! All told there will be approximately 5 adults (in addition to myself) and 6 children (in addition to Miss B!)

Let's start lining up the food now. I don't think I could possibly buy enough juice boxes and baloney for this crowd. Yowzers.

I'm one of those people who likes the idea of social gatherings but is inherently anti-social. It's why I forced myself to participate in the Cornell Ambassadors throughout college-- so that I would be required to talk to people. It's why I only will order pizza over the internet (that way I don't have to talk to the Domino's man on the phone). I love the concept of social interaction but when it comes right down to it I don't like people I don't know. Yes, I've said it before, couple all of this with my germaphobe ways and I am very Howard Hughes-esque. Without the fortune, unfortunately.

Moral of the story is, this whole thing is so not happening! I'd love to host an outdoor thing by the pool or whatnot (where the kids could be OUTside of the house, thus messy food and drink would not be of a concern and my taxidermy would remain unharmed).

And, I really don't have an issue with being part of the rotating hosting duties but I'd at least like to meet everybody first!



Sue said...

What nerve people have to just offer up your house without yu giving the okay....I hope you told them Miss Kitty has the Swine Flu...

Ellen said...

Ack, Crazy Mom rears her ugly head again. I feel so sorry for you.

I totally understand where you are coming from - the audacity of people to offer up your house as a meeting place and invite their friends too. How totally inappropriate - ask the Countess, she'll agree.