The Nativity Story New at IKEA

Leave it to Italy for politcians to suggest a boycott of IKEA because the store doesn't carry nativity scenes.

A representative from IKEA summed up the store very concsisely, indicating that: "we sell furniture and typical products from Scandinavia like meatballs and herring... rather than Nativity scenes which are more of a southern European tradition." Ah yes, meatballs, herring and a nativity scene, because apparently Italians like to display nativity scenes around their house at Christmas.

I thoroughly believe this since many Italians (both in Italy and elsewhere in the world) also like having statutes of the Virgin Mary on their front lawns. My question is, why would that translate into expecting that a Scandinavian furniture store in Italy would be compelled to stock such items? Besides, what would the nativity scene be named at IKEA-- the Nativiklop? the Bethlekoov?

Nosebleed!

And I'm not talking about bad seats at Yankee Stadium. Have you ever had one of these? The mom has had a history with nosebleeds (including the one that wouldn't stop and required cauterization.... ouch!) as was the grandfather... I've only had a few brushes previously with nosebleed imposters. This morning I got a gusher. I've had a cold for the past week and it seems to come and go and last night it was in rare form. All night my right nostril was completely plugged. At one point at about 4:30am I rolled over onto my left side and it opened just a bit but not enough to make sleeping like that comfortable, so I just rolled back to my right and was contented to only be able to breathe out of one side of my head. At about 5:27am I asked my poor husband to go downstairs and get me a bottle of ginger ale. Did I mention the sore throat? I figure it had to be a combination of half breathing out of my mouth and half some kind of awful post nasal drip (pleasant!) Miraculously the ginger ale seemed to do the trick. I managed to sleep soundly until 7:30.

Then I'm up and around, I shower, etc. and after I brush my teeth I realize that my nose is starting to unclog but I clearly have to blow my nose. It was one of those feelings where it seems like the Titanic is quickly sinking and if you don't act fast it will be at the bottom of the Atlantic. If you don't get rid of some ballast quickly, you'll be all congested once again. I take my opportunity. I don't even blow my nose with much force or gusto. What happens? All blood! Freaky, scary, bright red BLOOD! I semi freak out. Blood actually starts coming out of my nose independently and dripping on furniture. I tilt my head back and realize that's a bad idea! The husband tries to calm me down and suggests I stuff a tissue up my nose. I don't want to be one of "those" people, but really there's nothing else to do. This goes on for a good ten minutes. We have to leave for work.

By this time I have a headache in what I imagine to be the origin of the nosebleed somewhere up in between my eye and my nose. I have a bottle of Evian and a pack of tissues and we're trying to get to work. I find that the Evian bottle, when squished into my eye socket relieves some of the headache pain. We're driving on route 1 and I have a tissue shoved up one nostril and a bottle of Evian on my eye. I must have looked like a million bucks.

Eventually things seem to quiet down, we've moved on to my nose now just being runny and there doesn't seem to be any more blood. I get onto the train and try and sleep for a bit. When I arrive in NY apparently the jolt of having to stand and walk around made my nose decide, what the hell, let's start up again! It was less than before, but still, doesn't it just seem a little odd and unnatural for blood to be coming out of your nose? I'm at the job now and things seem to be better, though I'm still congested and at any time I might use that Evian bottle again.

Overheard in New York

Last night I left work and as I was walking west on 50th Street between 6th and 7th a Grey Line double decker tourist bus was heading in the opposite direction. Atop the bus was the tour guide using his microphone to tell this bus full of tourists all kind of odd information about Manhattan. Just as the bus went by, a random pedestrian yelled at the top of his lungs to the bus passengers, "Don't listen to him, he doesn't know what he's talking about. It's all LIES!"

Wow!

It's been six days since my last post and I'm having serious blogger withdrawal. What can I say, I didn't open my own computer since last Tuesday. Much was going on over the Thanksgiving weekend, a tremendous amount of cooking (Wednesday was lasagna, Thursday was turkey, ham, stuffing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, onion tartlets, green beans and the infamous Sonny's baked beans and last night was pulled pork, macaroni and cheese, home made cole slaw and corn bread...) interspersed with various pizzas, White Castle and all other such generally unhealthy but tasty stuff.

We also managed to finally see Casino Royale which is the longest Bond film known to man. Okay, Kudos to Daniel Craig. He was good-- rugged, actually muscular so it is believeable that he could do some of these stunts and stuff, but how long do you need to be playing poker for? The poker game went on for like four days. Why did they need to start out with ten players? Couldn't they have had five, double the buy in and let the game last half as long? And, how long would it take you to sail from the Bahamas to Venice? And, Eva Green. Bond Girl goes boring. Vesper Lynd was nothing but unlikeable.

I will also give kudos to the scenery-- they went to Lake Como, twice (and once again proved that yes, Venice and Lake Como are within driving distance of each other) ;) Though something's telling me Bond didn't make the trip in a BMW wagon.

Rosie, Kelly and Clay

I was reading my entertainment news today and saw a piece on how there was a feud brewing between Rosie O'Donnell and Kelly Ripa. Apparently, while Clay Aiken was co-hosting Live with Kelly he put his hand over her mouth to keep her from speaking (because really, what fill-in co-host wouldn't do that...??) and Kelly made a remark essentially saying, don't put your hand near me, I don't know where it's been.

Rosie, of course, comes on The View and goes on about how Kelly is homophobic. Rosie indicates that Kelly certainly wouldn't have made that remark if her co-host were someone like.... Mario Lopez. I'm sorry, Rosie, but get real with your examples. I'd have to say I'd be just as likely, if not more so to say that I didn't know where Mario's hands had been... I mean geesh, the man couldn't stay faithful to Ali Landry for five minutes, does it look like Clay ever even has had a date, with man, woman or vegetable?

Even better, I hadn't even thought of the best angle out of this whole story. While Rosie was being so quick to point a finger at a "homophobe" didn't she perhaps just "out" Clay??? Shouldn't that have been his decision, if he even is gay? Maybe Rosie would like to answer everybody's burning "is he or isn't he" questions... Tom Cruise? Anderson Cooper? Oh, wait, silly me, heaven forbid we could respect someone's privacy!

Over the River and Through the Woods...

Okay, so in preparation for Thanksgiving, I just wanted to let everyone know that the folks are heading into town. They started their journey at some point in the middle of the night (4am?) and are motoring their way up the Eastern Seaboard as I type this. The parents also happen to have two very important things in tow, Sonny's baked beans and a fifteen pound turkey. I had tried to get a turkey at Wegman's but when I went last week they hadn't put out their usual Thanksgiving spread. There was one lone mini Butterball in the freezer case and a bunch of off brand birds. I think it is fair to say that only a mom and dad would consider hauling a fifteen pound Butterball in their Volkswagen Bug Convertible fifteen hours to New Jersey.

Thanks Mom and Daaaaaad!!!!

No Rest for the Weary...

So last night I slept and I dreamed. However, it was not a peaceful sleep. Instead in my dreams I was performing in some sort of competition and when it was over, I said in my sleep-unconscious state, "Now I have to go up and vacuum."

Other random thoughts for today. Speaking of vacuuming, you know those commercials with James Dyson where he goes on and on about finally having invented a vacuum that "doesn't lose suction?" Yeah, well. I managed to find a way to make a Dyson lose suction.

Suck up an entire roll of gift wrap ribbon through the wand attachment.

I was vacuuming the bedroom, using the wand to get at dust bunnies under the dresser and the next thing I know I hear a "thup." "Thup, thup, thuppppppppppppp!" I pull the wand out from under the dresser in just enough time to see the suction from the wand frantically unravelling the ribbon from its little plastic caddy thing and the next thing I know it pulls the taped end right off the caddy and the ribbon is gone. Then the Dyson starts getting much quieter than usual and I notice it really doesn't have the same suction strength as before. I use it a bit more and when it kind of starts to smell like something is burning (always a bad sign) I finally decide I'll empty the cannister.

Yeah. That was a mistake. I go to unhook the canister and its so full that a giant dust bunny falls out of the hole in the cannister where dust goes in and then it is followed by a waterfall of green gift wrap ribbon. Ooops.

Once I emptied it, things worked fine again, but I think this may explain why I felt the need to vacuum in my dreams.

Hmpf. What else. Grocery shopping the Sunday before Thanksgiving should be considered a contact sport.

And, finally, on Saturday I got to spend some quality time with Mel and Thisbe and the Wee Kraken! It was much fun and we must do it again soon.

Wedding Tips for the New Mrs. Cruise

Msnbc has a useful little article this morning onWedding Tips for the New Mrs. Cruise. Some of my favorites include: "there’s nothing wrong with your marriage that vitamins and exercise can’t fix", "to be safe, it’s probably best if you just stopped aging all together" and, lets not forget that in 1996 Tom Cruise rescued a family at sea. Hopefully, now that they're getting married, all this hubbub can stop and we can get back to the really interesting celebrity news like who has Angelina Jolie's security team manhandled this week.

This morning I woke up far too late. I was tired from staying up late the night before, having waited for the husband to get home, and having made stir fry and subsequently having eaten myself into a food stupor. Yellow rice flavored with a generous serving of lemon, chicken stir fry with green peppers, yellow peppers, orange peppers, bean sprouts, mushrooms, carrots, zucchini... yum. (What can I say, I was watching Top Chef and got carried away).

So this morning I had approximately 20 minues to pull myself together. I didn't have an outfit picked out, and I had to shower. Bad things. I manage to shower, try to fix my hair, brush my teeth and am then struggling to find an outfit. It's supposed to rain heavily this evening so this creates shoe consequences. Thought about wearing wellies (with work shoes to change into)... couldn't find brown tights. Ended up with a brown corduroy theory pleated mini skirt and a pink sweater. Pulled out the black riding boots from J Crew. Ran downstairs in socks, a t-shirt carrying my boots and the sweater (luckily my coat was in the car).

Once I put my shoes on I realize that the skirt I am wearing is entirely too short to have on without tights. I hadn't ever really noticed this before. I always wear tights in fall/winter under skirts and hadn't really noticed that this is a bit too much like a cheerleader skirt and if I sit down the wrong way someone is going to get a glimpse of waaaay too much thigh. Somehow, when said thigh is swathed in tights it just doesn't seem trashy. Now, with just boot socks on, I suddenly felt naked.

I figured, okay, I'll go to Duane Reade. Surely, they'll have tights. Well, yes and no. At first blush all I found were black ribbed queen size tights from L'eggs. I briefly toyed with the idea of going to the Gap, but they don't open until 10. I managed to scour through the racks and find at least a size B. Thanks to the ridiculous amount of stretch in these tights they actually fit better than the "small" pair I bought from Banana. Of course, they too are ribbed and black. Luckily when they're on you really can't tell what color they are, but I am generally, more mismatched than I would like to be.

Note to self to make tomorrow a better day: Wake up earlier, or at least pick out an outfit ahead of time!

iPod Gremlins

Do you ever get that feeling that certain electronic equipment may have a 6th sense that allows them to read your mind?

For instance, yesterday on the train on my way home I pulled out my iPod. This being the new iPod referenced in a post last month. Now I had just listened to the thing the night before. I knew it was charged and I knew it had been working. I press the center button and what ho. Nothing happens. The screen is blank. No apple symbol comes up on the screen-- nothing. I think, okay, you must not have hit the button, try again. Try I do and same result-- no response. It is at this point when I think to myself: "I can't believe you. It hasn't even been a month, and already-- broken, what's it going to be this time. Damn you, iPod." but then, the fog lifts, my brain responds with-- "wait, this is no big deal. We've got the buyer protection plan from Best Buy. We'll take this puppy back and get a new one, thank *god* we bought that!"

And it is at that instant that the Apple symbol flashed on the screen and everything started working.

Its like the iPod knew it was being threatened with a return.

Overheard in the Office....

From snotty co-worker:

"I hate people like that. That's why lawyers get a bad name."

No, actually its people like you that give lawyers a bad name.

Sexiest Man Alive

People has named its Sexiest Man Alive for this year-- George Clooney. I know, I know, he's got that strange head bobble thing, but I just love him. People is trying hard to make up for when they gave the title to Nick Nolte in 1992.

The Tourist, or Mr McGregor

Okay, so can anyone help me locate where "The Tourist" is being filmed here in the Big Apple? I've been taunted by a couple of postings on the Gawker "Stalker" map, but I'd love to be able to try and find that great convergence of both Ewan McGregor and Hugh Jackman. (The husband claims he saw Ewan once at LaGuardia, but I don't have an autograph or a photo, so it's as good as a claim to have seen Bigfoot ordering a latte at Starbucks).

I'm too Sexy

Thanks to over an hour of work-related citrix computer problems it is now 1:06am, I'm not alseep, but instead I'm listening to Right Said Fred on my iPod.

I thought the torture was over when I left the office.

Luna Bars...

I've always wanted to like granola bars. Ever since I was a kid I got hooked in by the creepy Quaker Oats man and the image of those granola bars with little chocolate chips in them. I don't know why. I'm not a fan of trail mix, I hate oatmeal, farina, cream of wheat and all of that. I've also had an odd relationship with yogurt, however, also wanting to be able to "develop a taste for" that... something which I had managed to do right up until I had that one bad experience. Anyway, I digress. While some people try to have an "acquired" taste for beer, I try and acquire a taste for strange health foods (which I understand is completely counter to the fact that I won't eat fruit-- though, in my defense, I will eat fruit products and I have been very proud of myself that at the age of 30 I bought a juicer and have made a concerted effort to learn to love orange juice).

These days I'm in need of vitamins. I used to eat Frosted Flakes cereal bars for breakfast until they no longer carried them at Wegmans. Then one day, at brunch, a friend of a friend was talking about how on a walk around Manhattan up in Inwood she couldn't even find a Luna Bar. I had tried Pria bars, but never a Luna Bar. I filed this away in my memory.

The other day I was at Wegmans and I was drawn in to the power bar aisle. It is a scary place, really, burt's bees products on one side of the aisle and box upon box of various power bar related products on the other side. Cliff Bars, Luna Bars, Power Bars, Protien Bars, Pria Bars. Who even knows what to buy? And they all have strange "flavor" names like Dulce de Leche, Lemon Zest. Really, how is it that we're going to make this thing taste like Lemon Zest? Well. I got lured in. I bought a cookies and creme Luna Bar.

The next day at work, I try it. I'll give them credit, it's not half bad looking, at first. It kind of looks like someone made a rice krispie treat out of Cocoa Pebbles and then dipped the whole thing in a small layer of some sort of speckled frosting product. So for the taste. It leaves a bit to be desired. As long as you get some of the frosting stuff it's okay, but the main problem is that you have to look at this thing as its coming closer to your mouth. I swear, I think I saw tree bark.

I know, I know, it has folic acid, calcium, iron, various alphabetical vitamins, but still. Tree bark. It was in there. I know it.

Saturday Night Live

We managed to snag tickets to Saturday Night Live thanks to the ticket lottery which is held each August. Back in September I got a call saying we were on for the 11/11/06 show. We were both very excited when we found out that we'd be seeing Alec Baldwin and Christina Aguilera.

So, we headed into the city at about 6pm and thanks to theater traffic we ended up dropping the car off and heading to dinner at about 7:51pm. (After already having had to yell at other NJ drivers trying to navigate the merge into the Holland Tunnel.) Because apparently the family of four in the Hyundai Elantra just doesn't care if they're trying to drive us into traffic cones.

Anyhoo, we grabbed dinner and ended up heading over to 30 Rock at 9:30. We had been told to ask for "Kat's Line" and to get there not later than 10:15. By the time we got there there were already three lines formed and at least 20-30 people ahead of us in "Kat's Line." I'm at Rockefeller Center five days a week. I've just never had to actually stand in the lobby in a line after hours with no HVAC before. It was roasting. I should have known better and brought a bottle of water, but the NBC Pages made it very, very clear that going to the bathroom was verboten so I guess it's for the best that I didn't have any liquids on me. At about 10:30 we made our way through the metal detectors and up in an elevator to the 8th floor. This was just meant to bring us that much closer to the studio, to again wait in line. At least, however, we were now in a hallway at NBC which was actually air conditioned. All of us with lottery tickets were on one side of a hallway and all of the actual "Guests" glided right by us on the other side of the velvet rope. After a while the couple in front of us got too tired of standing and decided to sit on the ground (and they also whipped out a cross word puzzle). A bit later, two snooty snotty girls who thought they were Paris Hilton walk past this scene and say "This is soooo awkward." Moments later NBC Page Nazis come by and tell the two in front of us that they *have* to stand up. Meanwhile, we're just standing, waiting... I saw a partner from my old firm wander by with his wife-- sure he was in the "guest" line! Ha! Then we saw Stephen Baldwin, Kirsten Dunst and, much to the husband's delight, Maria Bartiromo (who looks much younger in person, by the way).

At about 11:20 they finally led us into the studio which is actually much smaller in person than it appears on tv. We managed to get front row seats but they were on the far left, but since so many of the skits are done on movable sets randomly scattered about the studio, there seemed to be no good seat and no bad seat in the house. In the moments before the show started we were both reprimanded for having our feet on the railing in front of our row and the husband got a nod of acknowledgement from Tracy Morgan who was sitting on a drum kit basically four feet below our seats.

Then the show started... (and someone explain to me how the partner from my old firm actually had a floor seat-- better, in fact, than even Stephen Baldwin???) Alec, Tracy and Tina Fey did the opening monologue. A few skits in, who shows up in the studio but Steve Martin, Martin Short and Paul McCartney!?! Then, the next thing we know, while Alec is doing his Tony Bennett bit, who comes out (and enters the set from right below our seats) but the real Tony Bennett? (The husband gets kudos for this because for the past week he's been wondering aloud whether Tony Bennett would make an appearance...)

Let's not forget Christina, by the way. There was certainly no lip synching going on during her performance. Let's not forget, too, that Christina and Tony did a duet as well. Anyhoo, it was all pretty neat. Especially being close enough to be able to read the cue cards and see that Alec Baldwin does a lot of spot on improvisation.

Once the show was over, we all filed out, but thanks to the husband's quick thinking we made a detour past the closest exit so we could both walk past the "essence" of Maria and get within close range of Stephen Baldwin. It was pretty cool, sure he's the crazy Baldwin, but who didn't love him in the Usual Suspects? I got to walk right past him on the way out! At the end of the night I blackberried with the partner from my old firm. We both agreed, great show. of course, he was off to the afterparty, we, well, we were off to New Jersey.

I told him to make sure he said hi to Sir Paul for me.

Lame Excuses...

Okay, so today I don't really have anything interesting to say (which I know, makes the terrible presumption that any of these posts really say anything interesting!) Anyhoo. I went to H&M on my way back from lunch and though I was very, very tempted to buy a black 100% cashmere ballet wrap sweater, I realized that it was approximately the same price as it would be at Bloomingdales. H&M is supposed to be about bargains. Checked out the Viktor & Rolf collection-- not nearly as interesting as last year's Stella McCartney line that sent shoppers into a riot.

Finally, I'm reserving more interesting things for tomorrow. We have tickets to see Saturday Night Live (the real, live performance at 11:30, not just the 8pm dress rehearsal). I've been told I can't take pictures (but as we recall from the Faith Healer/Ralph Fiennes post this hasn't stopped me before). I'm hopeful that I'll have stories to tell.

Love and Kisses,
Wonder

Tights...

A quick random posting about opaque tights (since it appears that a number of people have been interested in my search for opaque tights at old navy).... I went to Banana Republic (the same day I tried to exchange my boots) and saw some interesting tights. I ordered them over the internet-- they seemed to be kind of ribbed and mostly cotton. They were a bit pricey for tights... when they arrived at home I took them out of the package and even though they are a "small/medium" they are appoximately the length of a football field. I know they really don't have stretch in them so they have to be relatively close to real size, but come on?? I put them on and there was so much excess tights left over they already bagged up at my ankles. I thought to myself, fine I'll just pull them up really high like a girdle. Wrong. They were made for a 6 foot tall woman yet had an incredibly short rise, if you get my drift. They were super-low-rise 6 foot long tights. Because there's really such a great demand for that product.

Faster than a Speeding Locomotive...

This morning we're on the platform, in our usual spot awaiting the train. Since I logged a complaint on the NJTransit website the 8:23am train has been showing up at approximately 8:19 which is just early enough so that the "dinky" riders from Princteon Proper haven't managed to arrive at the station yet. While this tactic hasn't actually eased any of the excessive overcrowding on the train it does give those of us who drive to the station a leg up on the dinky riders. (Though this has meant having to run from the car to the platform as we hear the train approaching). A unique answer to my compliant that there aren't enough cars in the train.

Today, however, was different. Today they had a different engineer than usual (though, by no mistake not an engineer that we haven't encountered before). This morning the train was three minutes late. Perhaps in an attempt to make up this difference, the train barrels up to the platform. We all step within the "yellow" line, but it's one of those things where you can completely tell: THE TRAIN IS COMING TOO FAST. ITS NOT GOING TO STOP.

About three weeks ago we had encountered this problem for the first time. The train blew right past the platform. It ended up stopping about three hundred feet from the end of the platform. Waited there (as if it were at it's usual stopping place, ready to accept passengers), didn't back up to the platform to actually pick up the passengers... and then just rolled away. On that day, out of some sort of random miracle everybody was let on the Amtrak which used to come at 8:36 (which has now been permanently suspended after three mysterious fare hikes...)

So, this morning we're all pretty much expecting a repeat of the last time. As the front car sped past us on the platform you could see the engineer (who looked to be about 16) fumbling in the cabin frantically looking for the brakes. He managed to stop the train with three or four cars still on the platform. This, however, threw the conductors into a tizzy because they had to now figure out how to only open the doors in the cars on the platform and not any of the doors of the cars which were just suspended over open track. We sit. Waiting. There are people inside the train who want to get off. It's a tense moment. We're all half expecting the train to just pull away (because, that would be typical of NJTransit).

Surprisingly the doors open, people are let on. Its the usual stampede for seats. We politely ask the conductor to remind the engineer that when he gets to Penn Station, there will be a wall at the end of the track so he may want to take it easy.

Dewey Beats Truman

Okay, so I know at the end of the day Bob Menendez did beat Tom Kean, Jr. (and really people, it's spelled KEAN not KANE, it's like Brett Favre-- pronounce it how it's spelled, but I digress...) but last night at approximately 8:30 Wolff Blitzer and Anderson Cooper on CNN were "giving New Jersey" to Bob Menendez even though only 5% of the polls were reporting and Tom Kean, Jr. had 51% of the vote! Their rationale was "well, you know, New Jersey is a "blue state", it's always heavily Democratic." Okay, but I've turned on CNN *while the elections are happening* not for a prediction or for their analysis, but actually for them to report the news. So, if at 8:30pm, with 5% of precincts reporting Tom Kean, Jr. has *more* votes than Bob Menedez, then he is, at least at that moment, winning. Give the man a break, let him have that false sense of hope. I mean they didn't even back it up by saying that the precincts not yet reporting are historically democratic, yada, yada, yada, just that "Jersey is a "blue state"."

I mean, if it's 11:30pm and the Yankees are playing a game on the West Coast and the score is 5-3 in favor of the Angels, or whomever, does Marv Albert tell us that based on the Yankee's having won the World Series 26 times we're just going to give them the game?


ps. Random Thought of the Day: What does it say about a person when an Egg McMuffin settles their stomach?

When Co-Workers Attack.

Bad enough that I go into the ladies room and get trapped into a conversation about a conference call scheduled for later this afternoon, but as I'm exiting I'm told by my pregnant co-worker, "You look tired, but you don't have nearly as good an excuse to look tired as I do."

Yeah, whatever makes you feel better about yourself. I may have generally lost much of my motor skills and the will to live generally but I am dressed in matching clothes, my hair is combed and I have lipstick on!

Weird Dreams....

So I'm sure this is in part spurred on by that commercial for sleep medication that has Abe Lincoln and a badger in it, but this morning was my turn for a weird dream.

I was at a work sponsored holiday party (but in true dream fashion it wasn't my actual work, it was some other, more glam, fictional work...) and I was waiting in the buffet line for deli sandwiches with Woody Allen and Diane Keaton. It was great, we all knew each other, Benny Goodman's "Sing Sing Sing" was playing. If only Alan Alda had been there.

And no, I haven't recently been watching Manhattan Murder Mystery.

Random Thoughts...

So, here's my Larry King-esque posting for the weekend.

How nice is it when you just happen to be sitting on the couch with your laptop and all of a sudden a little grey cat comes and curls up next to you and starts to purr. (Okay, maybe she's not so little, but she's still all soft and warm, so that counts for something!)

Cupcakes. Mini cupcakes. I love mini cupcakes.

Another nice thing is to have the Sunday paper (the New York Times is especially nice. I'm still a sucker for the weddings section, and real estate. I just realized I haven't even cracked a page yet!

Random thought. When I bought tickets to go on the Radio City Music Hall Backstage tour, I really didn't expect that a tour of the men's room would be part of the package. I also didn't expect that a stop at the ladies room would be featured and that a couple of men from Barcelona would follow us ladies on the tour into said ladies room.

Antiques Roadshow...

In response to Thursdays post, what do you do to follow up Pizza on Wednesday? Burger King on Thursday. Truly a food mistake. So that meant we had to try and do something decent on Friday. We figured we would go to Serafina for pizza, but considering last time we went somehow we managed to score the very in corner table at 61st Street I didn't want to press my luck. I knew I was totally unfabulous and would get stuck in the back by the pizza oven. So we chose Inagiku in the Waldorf, thanks in part to Open Table.

It was great, the husband got some sort of fancy shmancy beef flown in from Japan (down side of which is he had to cook it himself on a hot stone presented to our table) and I got chicken yakitori and spicy chicken rolls.

Lo and behold, while sitting and enjoying our dinner who walks by with his son but one of the Keno brothers! What is even more odd is that this is the second time we've run into this Keno at a restaurant, the last time being about two years ago at Serafina on 79th Street. I still have no idea if it is Leigh or Les, but does it matter- it's still totally random!

Advice...

Don't order pizza on Wednesday. Last night we had pizza. Now it's Thursday and the thrill is gone. What are we going to have for dinner tonight that's fun and exciting and a way to say Friday is almost here, it's almost the weekend? Nothing! All the fun is gone. What a let down. Pizza on Wednesday, what for dinner on Thursday, pasta? Frozen pizza? Ugh. How lame.

The Hog of Steel

In response to Ana's message, for a full bibliography and images of the infamous Wonder Warthog...

Zoophobia! Zootopia, Zoo something or other...

We went to the Bronx Zoo on Sunday with Dave, Emily, Jake, Raf and Katie...

The Cheetah was bored, generally.



Birds in motion!

Lunchtime Adventures

I went to Banana Republic to exchange a pair of boots for a different size and to return the oft-discussed wool pants that I've been meaning to return for over a month. I go and I try on replacement boots in a size 7 1/2 and all seems right with the world. I go up to the counter and ask whether I can do an even exchange-- and am told that I can. With one hiccup. My original boots (bought online and sent to New Jersey) were sans sales tax. This completely stymied the employee. He tells me, it's an even exchange, but you'll owe $14.74 in sales tax." But I say, "it's an even exchange". He agrees, but then he follows this picurean logic by saying, that I'm "buying" the new boots in New York, so there's sales tax. It's a "state thing" and "there's nothing" that he can do about it. But "I'm not 'buying' the boots, I'm exchanging them!" I say. Then I ask to speak to a manager and I get the famous-- "he'll tell you the same thing." But wait. If I'm doing an exchange, this Banana still has a pair of boots to sell-- New York will still make its sales tax. If they charge me sales tax and then some other poor lug tax on the pair of boots I'm exchanging NY has now made $30 dollars off this whole thing. So, eventually I gave up. He didn't quite get it and tries to give me back the boots I was going to exchange. I remind him that they don't fit and I want my money back! Finally I just ordered a new pair on the web. Geesh.

My second lunchtime adventure happened at McDonald's. I know, I shouldn't be going to McDonald's anyway, especially since there's always one McNugget in the bunch that's shaped like a boot. But, to McDonald's I went and I asked for their hot mustard sauce for my McNuggets. I knew in advance this might be problematic because on more than one occasion in the past I have only ended up with actual mustard, rather than mustard sauce. What do I get this time? A packet of mustard and a tube of "mild picante" sauce. Who even knew McDonald's carries picante sauce!?! Is this given to those rare brave souls who actually buy a breakfast burrito? Needless to say I went back to the counter and asked to "exchange" my sauce for sweet and sour. Luckily they didn't try and charge me sales tax.

Ever meet

one of those people who starts all of their conversations in the middle of a sentence? Possibly, a sentence not even about the present but about an event that happened yesterday, or the day before? For instance, I just had someone pop into my office and start saying:

"very verbal, she's really very verbal, cute kid isn't she?"

I'm assuming he's taking about his daughter who visited the office yesterday, but it's a little odd because I haven't spoken to this man in at least a week and I didn't speak to him or his wife or daughter yesterday-- I just saw them pass by my door in the middle of the day.

This is similar to last week when he popped into the office of my co-worker (with whom I was sitting, as we were actively engaged in a conference call) and he shouts into the office something to the effect of "we collected $85 grand on that one!"

What one? What are you talking about? We're not working on anything together, we don't even know what you mean!?!